And now, the sequel!!

The only song with a less-imaginative title than The Myoblast Song,

The Myoblast Song 2.0

Download an mp3 of The Myoblast Song 2.0 by clicking here
(Performed by Matt Springer with help from Robin Holbrook, Mark LaBarge, and Joe Pomerening)

If you have a slow connection and don't want to download a whole mp3, you can STREAM a RealAudio file.  If you don't have a recent version of RealAudio; you can download it for free by clicking here.

(The recording of The Myoblast Song 2.0 is audio extracted from a movie of a live performance, and you will most definitely not be able to understand all of the words.  I recommend that you follow along with the text printed below as you listen to the recording!)

Download printable pdf version

Make sure to see the original Myoblast Song


 
 

The Myoblast Song 2.0

(The Sequel)

© 2001 by Matt Springer

(to the tune of I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major General
from Gilbert & Sullivan's The Pirates of Penzance)


I am a basic scientist who likes to study muscle cells
I grind them up and run them out on various electric gels
I heat them up to see if they are inerts or inflammables
and use them to deliver therapeutic genes to animals.

They say the future lies in cloning genes and drug discovery,
the use of novel proteins, their production and recovery
or generating products that will strengthen the ecology—
[spoken] ecology...fleacology...astrology...—oh yes:
a host of problems solved by implementing pharmacology.

[chorus]
    a host of problems solved by implementing pharmacology,
    a host of problems solved by implementing pharmacology,
    a host of problems solved by implementing pharmacolo-cology

There's Phoenix cells producing tons of retroviral particles,
results of which are written up in scientific articles,
but give me muscle fibers that are classified as slow or fast,
I'd really rather study the amazing muscle myoblast!

[chorus]
    but give him muscle fibers that are classified as slow or fast,
    he'd really rather study the amazing muscle myoblast!
  
 

It truly is amazing what a muscle cell in culture does
it fuses with the others getting bigger than it ever was
and that's the thing that makes them so attractive to biologists
it's even caught the eyes of several well-known pharmacologists.

I could decide to study immunology and allergies
to try to find molecularly why it is we cough and sneeze
Or even try to find out what to do for eyes and sinuses—
[spoken] sinuses...linuses...rhinuses...—oh, yes:
By studying the kinase kinase kinase kinase kinases!

[chorus]
    by studying the kinase kinase kinase kinase kinases,
    by studying the kinase kinase kinase kinase kinases,
    by studying the kinase kinase kinase kinase kinase kinases

The insulin receptor is a fascinating thing I hear,
there's tons of other research that's reported all thoughout the year
but this is not the research that I really want to try at last
as long as I can study the amazing muscle myoblast!

[chorus]
    but this is not the research that he really wants to try at last
    as long as he can study the amazing muscle myoblast!
 
  

I could go where the glamour is and study embryonic cells
or play around with prions in the hopes of winning five Nobels
or study human cloning where I'd hope to set a precedent
by dabbling in politics by cloning the vice-president.

I could just work on what it is the others all are studying;
no worry 'bout the scientific waters I'd be muddying;
but scientific progress tends to favor the iconoclast—
[spoken] iconoclast...ohio-ast...omyoblast...—oh, yes:
I'd better do the stuff that they'll remember when I'm gone at last!

[chorus]
    he'd better do the stuff that they'll remember when he's gone at last,
    he'd better do the stuff that they'll remember when he's gone at last,
    he'd better do the stuff that they'll remember when he's up and gone at last

They're sequencing the genome and I'm sure they'll soon cure all disease,
they're growing hearts in test tubes and will soon make organs as they please,
but even after human cloning research's time has come and passed,
there'll still be people watching the amazing muscle myoblast!

[chorus]
    but even after human cloning research's time has come and passed,
    there'll still be people watching the amazing muscle myoblast!